Remembering My Dad

As I sit here today in celebration of my dad, Leroy Deckard Sr., I am celebrating his life in my heart because dad has crossed over the Jordan and into the Promised Land. I know he lives with God now, because dad accepted Jesus as his Lord and Savior and for that I’m forever grateful!! Dad lived a full and fruitful life. He was a great man of honor; a respected resident and proud US citizen. I celebrate his life because dad was a giver who loved his family so dearly. His wife and children came first then everything else afterward. Leroy Deckard Sr., better known as “Bud” was a great man, a devoted brother, a loving husband, a super father and an awesome friend. Dad always took care of home; his family never wanted for anything. He was dedicated to everything he did and never complained about much except for when it was necessary. He never judged nor had anything negative to speak about anyone [that I knew of] but always gave constructive & sound advise. He was always positive and upbeat. Not that I am implying that dad was a perfect man [only Jesus was] but he was an honest & fair man.

Dad loved to sing. Anytime Dad was feeling his best he would hum a little ditty or two while walking up and down the halls at home -- just singing and clapping his hands. (what a sight!) Mom would often shake her head and say, "uh, that's a shame" then chuckle.

My dad was a hard working man. Dad began working at the ripe age of 10 years old. He took care of his younger brother during their childhood, after both sets of parents had passed on. He worked while his younger sibling and only brother attended grade school. Dad chose to give up his childhood & primary education to ensure that his brother would complete school. As time progressed, dad's brother graduated from high school then attended barber college. Dad and his brother were able to purchase some property to build a barber shop. I believe this was the first African-American owned and operated barber shop in Dalworth [Grand Prairie TX]. It took nothing but pure love [agape love] for dad to give up their dreams and goals to see another’s dreams and goals become a reality; takes a real man with a big heart to do that.

In the early 1950’s, dad moved from Ennis to Dallas TX. Shortly afterward, he met & married mom in 1953. He was a devoted husband for nearly 55 years, until his death. Wow, what a long time to be in love with one person...and like them at the same time. As much as I remember about dad while growing up, he never missed an opportunity to show love for his wife and his children. Dad would often greeting mom with a morning kiss on the cheek after working all night.

Dad worked the grave yard shift (6pm – 6 am). Every morning he would arrive home, eat breakfast with his family then off to bed to prepare for another day of work. As his children grew older and moved out, it was just me and my younger sibling left at home. Still, dad kept his routine -- get off work, eat breakfast then off to bed. Dad was an unselfish man. He was always thinking of others and giving more of himself than most do in a lifetime. During the early stages of grade school, my younger sibling and I were required to ride the bus to school. I really didn’t care for riding the bus because the children were too loud and some were a bit out of control. One day, I asked mom if she would drive us to school but dad stepped in and volunteered and told us "if you don’t like riding the bus to school, I’ll take you myself."

Dad, being so loving and kind, after we'd all have breakfast, he would drive me and my sister to school [after working all night]. Thank God he found the strength to stay alert enough to drive us safely to school then back home safely to get in bed, only to prepare for another day of work. As my younger sibling and I grew up, dad still drove us to school every single morning without complaining then would pick us up after school. (What a DAD!)

I remember the day that I passed my driving test to obtain my license. That day, I came home excited!! I ran in the house and showed dad my driver’s license. Dad was so proud and very happy for me. Now, I’m not sure if that was a celebration of relief to get HIM off the hook from driving me and my sister to school every morning but, that didn’t matter, all I remember is that huge grin on dad's face that said, thank God – now YOU can drive yourself and your sister to school from now on!! Dad wanted to test my driving skills so he asked me to drive him to the store. Now, being a person of always wanting to please my parents, I was so nervous but I said to myself, “I can do it!” So, we drove to the store then took the long route back home. After that, he was convinced that I was ready to take on the major responsibility of driving without a chaperon. Dad now entrusted me enough to drive his personal vehicle to school [at 16 ½ years old].

Back in the early 80’s most kids, especially in my neighborhood, were driven to school or took the bus -- even walked to a local school in our neighborhood. I felt like a privileged driver and was proud that dad trusted me to be responsible enough to drive myself and a passenger to and from our destinations each week. He always knew that I was a responsible person so, he allowed me certain privileges that some kids in my "hood" didn't receive. I drove myself and my younger siblin to school until we graduated.

Dad saw greatness in me and knew that I had a heart of gold such as his. Dad saw ME and always knew I was a little different from my other siblings. Always so happy, goofy, and making others laugh and feel good about themselves. Not that my siblings were not special too but Dad saw something extra special in me. He saw that I was one of God’s greatest exhorters and gifts to humankind and knew that I would accomplish great things in his lifetime. I will miss dad's physical presence but his spirit lives within me.

As I look in the mirror and see a reflection of my dad every day, I am reminded of how special he was to me. My dad always encouraged me to do my best and I will never forget how special he made me feel. I can still remember the sound of his voice that said, "GO 'HEAD ON KID!" Dad never missed an opportunity to help me with any one of my numerous adventures. He set the example for me as well as all of his children to follow. Dad was admired and loved by many but not as much as me.

I was very proud to call him dad and he was proud to have a beautiful daughter like me. I was his special light and he was mine. Dad always showed me how special I was because every time I would come into his presence, he would give off this luminous smile as bright as a 100 watt light bulb. That smile would light up any dark room!! He was always supportive of me and never judged nor said anything negative about my precious life. He loved ME just as Jesus loves his brothers and sister who belonged to the Family of Believers -- for who we are and not who society thinks we should be.

I thank God for my dad and for the final moments we spent together. I was able to anoint dad with blessed oil, recite the 23 Psalm and pray with him before he crossed over. I whispered to Dad, "if your desire is to live then fight but if your will is to go home and be with the Lord, then go home. Either way, I’m OK." I assured dad that mom would be taken care of and not to worry. I asked dad to go on home and rest in peace. He was still my dad so I couldn't demand him to do anything -- so I asked nicely.

I will miss my dad but I know God was ready for him to come home. I don’t blame God for wanting his son back because he was someone very special. So dad, this is not a good-bye but a see you later. I love you and will always cherish our time together. See you on the other side!

Your loving daughter,

Doris Gale

10-3-07