What Does It Means To Be A Father?

Father's Day is approaching Sunday June 19. And although my earthly father has gone on to be with our Heavenly Father, his spirit is still with me and I will celebrate his legacy; not only that day but for the rest of my life. No, his absence does not alleviate me missing him; and although he was my biggest fan and support, I know he is one of my guardian angels watching over me. Thank you God!!!

A father means honor, strength, discipline, wisdom, courage, faith, love, commitment, perseverance, presence. The list can go on and on but I'll stop there. I'm sure being a father can be an awesome yet overwhelming privilege and can distort these roles. I'm sure knowing that you are the "bread-winner" or sometimes the primary care-giver can be taxing and scary but our Heavenly Father will give you the strength and stamina to succeed [as a father] so just keep on trusting in God for all you need and these vital roles will come easier to fulfill.

As a daughter, my paternal father was a real father in every sense of the word. (I'm not reducing or discounting the term dad but "dad" does not always have to be a child's biological father). A "father" is fully engaged and involved and offers [developmentally] to specific provisions to their child/children throughout their lives and are even impacted [themselves] by their doing so."

"A father handles his business without complaining about how much it will cost, how much work it takes, how often that his presence is important or how sacrificial his role." A father does not keep account of what he spends nor brags about it; he just does it because that's apart of his role.

My dad never complained about being a father because he knew that if he helped to create a life, he was also responsible for helping to take care of that life. My father knew that being a father meant that someone is depending upon him for their well-being and for setting a positive example. My father didn't stick out his chest when it was convenient or during "man-talk" but he showed his love for his children by unselfishly caring for us, which was FAR more important than any amount of money, position or social status.

"Money, neither position nor social status can take the place of real love. All these categories are finite and temporal but love is everlasting."

July 2010, in an exclusive interview with Yahoo News and The Huffington Post, Warren Buffett credited his success to his father for teaching him how to live, and explained that all parents can make a "better human being" by offering their children unconditional love: "The power of unconditional love. I mean, there is no power on earth like unconditional love. And I think that if you offered that to your child, I mean you’re 90 percent of the way home. There may be days when you don’t feel like it, it’s not uncritical love, that’s a different animal, but to know you can always come back, that is huge in life. That takes you a long, long way. And I would say that every parent out there that can extend that to their child at an early age, it’s going to make for a better human being." Wow, what a POWERFUL testimony!

When I was a little girl, my father was one of my biggest earthly influences, other than my mother. Bud Deckard taught me to depend on God and my God-given abilities. He also taught me to save some money for a rainy day (because the rain will come). He also advised me to spend money when necessary and not try to keep up or impress others. Keep some pocket- change handy for emergencies and have one reliable friend that I can call upon no matter what the circumstance. He also taught me to pay my bills and pay them ON TIME . Do not borrow money you know you can't pay back. He taught me to live within my current means and life will be kind to me. He was right. "Life is kind because I'm not trying to keep up with others but staying ahead." Amen! These are great lessons for life and should be taught, especially by influential fathers. Simple and biblical principles should also be instilled in children and fathers should set forth a positive Christian and responsible example for their child/children to follow.

Lying, deceptive practices and pretense does NOT set forth a good example. Lip service is just jaw-jacking and anybody can do that! Fathers need to be about what you preach, how you teach and careful of your steps. Follow God first and His biblical guidelines (not human's standards) then be that father you say you are then fatherhood will become easier and more fulfilling for you.

Even though life is neither always easy nor pleasant, nothing and NO ONE should take your place as a father in the life of your child/children. Time lost can never be regained and trust is a faithful and teachable friend. BUT, if you live opposite of them, then you can only expect disappointment and trouble.

If you live by biblical principles and set good examples then you will leave your mark [in this life] with dignity, honor and integrity in Christ. BE a father, a mentor, a friend. Don’t just talk about it...BE about it! Let's back this lesson up with scripture:

Proverbs - Chapter 3:1-12

1. My son, do not forget my teaching, but keep my commands in your heart,
2. for they will prolong your life many years and bring you prosperity.
3. Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart.
4. then you will win favor and a good name in the sight of God and man.
5. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;
6. in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.
7. Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord and shun evil.
8. This will bring health to your body and nourishment to your bones.
9. Honor the Lord with your wealth, with the firstfruits of all your crops;
10. then your barns will be filled to overflowing, and your vats will brim over with new wine.
11. My son, do not despise the Lord's discipline and do not resent his rebuke,
12. because the Lord disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in.


Happy Father's Day!